Archive for the ‘marriage’ Category
Hello Friends and Happy Tuesday
Have you and your spouse started thinking about retirement? Perhaps it’s several years off or maybe in the not-so-distant future. What are your plans, will you be traveling or just relaxing on the back deck watching the sun rise while sipping your morning coffee?
Hubby will be retiring from the State of Delaware in July, but since I have at least 5 more years, he has to wait for me…and while he waits, he will be working no doubt about it. Just because he’s retiring with a full pension doesn’t negate the fact that we’ll have a son in college and bills to pay.
Retirement should be a dream come true filled with fun and excitement but if you make mistakes in not planning, that dream can quickly turn into a nightmare.
According to the experts, there are 7 mistakes that couples should avoid if they want their retirement years to be truly golden.
- Couples never talked about what each of them expected retirement to be, i.e. personal interest or professional goals
- They haven’t planned for emergencies, i.e. illnesses, accidents and major home repairs
- Couples in their 2nd marriages didn’t plan for unique problems that come with blended families, ie. adult children needing financial assistance
- They didn’t do proper financial planning. i.e. fail to calculate the amount of money needed in retirement, lifestyle and living costs changes
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Couples didn’t consider the high costs of health care or long-term care
- Assuming that because you are married you can act for each other in business and health care decisions, consider getting a Power of Attorney
- Only one partner is handling financial matters – couples need to talk regularly about finances and both should actively participate
If you and your spouse haven’t sat down and talked about your retirement plans, the time to do so is now so you can make those golden years tarnish free!
What are your thoughts?
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I’ll admit it, I am a big cry baby, I used to cry at the drop of a hat, but then again I’ve had a lot to cry about over the years. My husband, not so much. I can count on 1 hand just how many times I’ve seen him cry and I think the number may be close to if not zero, he said it has been more, but I’m talking about “boo hoo” crying.
Our oldest son is just like him, he would drop a few tears every now and then if he got into trouble as a young kid. Now, my youngest son, had he been a girl, I would have dubbed him a “Drama Queen”. Like me, he can cry in a New York minute, mostly to get out of trouble, but I’ve seen him cry at funerals so some of those tears have been genuine.
I want to ask my husband and oldest son, “will you cry if I die?”
I guess I should go ask them…hold on…I’ll be right back…
…Okay, I’m back and they both said, “yes” but not until after they looked at me as if I had two heads! I told you, it was just a random thought!
Goodnight!
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Hello Friends and Happy Thankful Thursday
If you’re married, I’m sure you’ve heard, “never go to bed angry”, but I disagree, sometimes I think you should go to bed angry – you need the rest.
Yes, communication is important in a marriage but there are times when you don’t want to talk you just want to go to sleep. Who really wants to stay up late talking, arguing or trying to compromise, go to sleep, you need your rest, unless of course, it’s a life and death situation.
I met my husband at the age of 28, he was 32, we had both graduated from Delaware State College and each had our share of relationships. We’d disagree on certain things because we were not raised by the same people in the same house, city or state, so having different upbringings made us think differently. Getting married and combining two lifestyles can be rough but that doesn’t mean we don’t love each other and can’t work together.
In the beginning our biggest arguments occurred after the death of my sister; giving birth to our oldest, a 3 month preemie who weighed 2 1/2 lbs and then moving my grandmother into the home, all of this was before our 2nd Wedding Anniversary.
We would argue, or he would get moody, I call it male PMS, (MMS) and we wouldn’t talk to each other for days. We’d go to bed angry and I’d sleep like a baby because I needed the rest and having him stay on his side of the bed and me on mine made for uninterrupted sleep.
There were many times that I wanted to kill him and I’d lay in bed thinking of ways to do it and how to hide the body without getting caught. The fear of going to prison always stopped me, I knew my sons would rat me out once they found out that their daddy was buried in the backyard under the tomato plants!
Once hubby finishes his MMS cycle, after a couple of days of complete silence, I’ll walk by him and he’ll grab me for a kiss. Later on that night it’s on and popping and I’m fine with that because am thankful for having those few nights of rejuvenating rest.
Going to bed angry isn’t the end all, if you can’t agree or compromise just go to bed angry, you need the rest and hopefully in the morning you’ll feel better.
This works for us, but it may not for you, so if you rather stay up all night to talk and argue that’s fine, but for me, I go to bed angry because I need the rest!
BTW, we have been married for 23 years and for that I am thankful!
Have you ever gone to bed angry at your significant other?
I am also thankful for my family, you my bloggy friends and of course my faith, how about you, what are you thankful for this week?
Stay Blessed ~ No Stress in 2014!
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Have you and your spouse started thinking about retirement? Perhaps it’s several years off or maybe in the not-so-distant future. What are your plans, will you be traveling or just relaxing on the back deck watching the sun rise while sipping your morning coffee?
